Dieting During the Holidays?!

The fact that I have started this journey at the pinnacle of the holiday season is not lost on me. People always say,"I will start after the holidays, I want to enjoy my food."  To be honest, there are really two reasons for starting now. The first reason is that I have a doctor's appointment in two weeks. I know it sounds silly. I have a fabulous doctor who struggles with his weight. He is sympathetic and encouraging. However, for me to have to stand on that scale, which by the way, always weighs heavier no matter what doctor's office you go to, face the doctor and have to say I gained weight is like torture for me. It is that moment in time I am completely vulnerable. No oversized sweatshirt, or full body spanx can cover this. In most other areas of my life I am a success. I have been a nurse practitioner for 12 years, I have completed 5 international adoptions and been married nearly 20 years. It is just this little thing, this weight thing I have battled and battled. Somehow in the fluorescent light of the exam room I can feel just like I did as a fat child standing at the bus stop being called "Jonah". 

The second reason for starting now has to do with the notion of the "last meal". Anyone who has been around the dieting world for any length of time has done this. One last cookie.  One last binge at the favorite restaurant, one last holiday season of tempting roll out cookies and fudge. Honestly, I did all that. As I said, my beloved sister-in-law had the surgery the day before me. We did the whole prep together. We ate many "last meals". I can remember sitting in a restaurant when the waitress asked us if we wanted onion rings with our meal. We looked at eachother, burst out laughing and said,"of course". For the most part I was very compliant before surgery with the occasional splurge as if I was bidding a fond fairwell to my beloved high calorie foods. The reality is, life does not work that way. I cannot think of a thing I haven't had at least a bite of since surgery. So, the point of having a "last meal" is really just to give myself an excuse to eat. So, starting at the holidays is more a safety mechanism to be sure I do not gain a ton of weight. Oh, I will have a high calorie item or two, but hoping I can build it in to my points the way I am supposed to. That, as they say, is the plan. Must be working...I lost another pound!